This is just a quick blog as it’s something I promised to do a while back and I’m ultra lazy with my blogging, although the intention is always there.
I am writing this purely from my own observations and point of view as I realise that making sweeping statements can offend but if you are not guilty of some of the things that I am going to cover then obviously I’m not talking about you.
I briefly mentioned in my last blog that a client of mine had got into a situation by where they were being blackmailed by a ‘Domme’ they had visited without their consent. This was causing them a huge amount of upset and distress and as I was the only person in their city that knew about their fetishes\kinks I was the only person they could come to for help.
It’s the first time anyone has approached me with this problem so I was unsure how to proceed but more than happy to help as this is a pretty low thing to do and a massive abuse of trust….obviously.My first course of action was to message the person concerned to politely ask her to stop what she was doing as it was illegal and causing distress, no reply was received and she continued in her threats to expose my client to family and friends.
The next logical step was a visit to the police station, I accompanied client and the matter was dealt with quickly, thoroughly and delicately by the police, but the fear my client had was terrible, and it was an incredibly brave thing to do.
The matter is now resolved, blackmail material destroyed and a hard and what should be a completely unnecessary lesson learned.
Listening to the details of the events leading up to the visit to this person I did think it was a very strange practise to acquire clients and also incredibly naive on clients part but he is young and I guess had some experience which led him to believe that his privacy and limits would be respected whoever he visited.
To highlight some points that I thought could be seen as danger signs of someone to avoid, this person approached my client on Twitter and somehow managed to persuade him to travel a couple of hundred miles, meet up with somebody she knew who would then drive him to her house. Personally I would never approach a client and don’t imagine any genuine Domme would, so this could be viewed as suspicious. If somebody asked you to go to a strange city, meet a stranger and be driven to an unknown location and an unknown person would you go in other circumstances? Not if you have half a brain, use common sense as you would in any day to day situation. Don’t be ruled by your cock if that’s possible!
When my client arrived at the location, filming was all set up to take place and he felt that he couldn’t refuse to be filmed, if you feel you can’t stop a situation you have not agreed to, turn around and walk out the door, if possible. My client was now in a situation where he didn’t know where he was, he didn’t know who the people were and clearly felt intimidated. Whilst I’m writing this I actually feel like clobbering him for being so bloody stupid, but if he’s done it chances are others will get into the same situation.
As far as I can establish no consultation or discussion of limits took place, this might seem like a ‘boring’ thing to do when you want a spontanious, thrilling experience but We are not mind readers and what you may consider exciting to begin with can quickly turn into a scary and upsetting experience, at best disappointing.
It’s great to take a liking to a Domme and certainly to travel to session with them but do some research first. Does She have a decent, professional website, professional communication, communicating via Twitter or other social media doesn’t come off as professional to me, but like I said this is just my opinion. Does your preferred Mistress have interest in a potential matching of likes and dislikes? Your level of experience? If you have any physical limitations or health issues? I think these things are important to know before booking a session and I would never see a new client without a discussion beforehand.
Overall use your noggin for crying out loud, do your research and if you don’t feel the person has your best interests at heart, don’t visit them!
There is a huge market for online domination now too which holds massive potential to become unstuck and having similar threats made in order to extort money from you. I haven’t ever done any online stuff, mostly due to the fact I love real time sessions so much but I don’t have a problem with it per se, not being experienced with this I don’t feel equipped to give detailed advice but I guess the same rules should apply, check they are genuine and go through a website which is designed for this type of work. Anybody can set up a Skype account and call themselves a Domme, don’t let your dick get you into something you can’t get out of because of a pretty face or sexy body. There are a whole host of beautiful, talented and experienced Dommes you can choose from.
I should conclude that the person responsible was arrested and questioned and material destroyed but is back on the scene.
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